We are not responsible for other people’s views, thoughts, actions or perceptions. We cannot control how others see the world or how they want to see us. Theses things are not our responsibility.
We can show compassion and kindness. We can often make a difference but in the end we all choose our own individual perspectives. We choose how we see our world and the people in it – and our lives are deeply affected by that choice.
And yet when we are hurting we often try to work through ‘how he/she made me feel’ and we replay this over and over trying to find answers or reasons that prolong the hurt and resolve nothing. Whilst we may feel pain it is our own re-action and not the action itself that creates it. In not realising this, we are giving away our own power and rather than releasing pain the opposite happens- we become more attached to suffering.
Our internal translation of other people’s behaviour is often the root of our own suffering. In the emotion of pain, fear or anger we forget we too can choose. Our ego focuses on the many usually negative perceived reasons for the action rather than our own re-action to it.
Whilst it’s likely we will all experience the pain of dishonesty, irrational behaviour or rejection at some point in our lives if we can step back and take time to be kind to ourselves we see that our own internal dialogue can be either the route to continued suffering or the path to release.
By choosing to make the situation about ourselves rather than the actions and motives of others we can see that sometimes people may be unkind or unreasonable. They may be dishonest or insincere, but we learn that their actions are not really about us. We learn to be kind to ourselves anyway. When we realise the only person truly responsible for how we feel is ourselves we can be kind to others too. Because in the end it is between you and your God – it was never about them anyway.
‘People are often unreasonable, irrational and self-centred. Forgive them anyway
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives Be kind anyway
If you are successful, you may win false friends and sincere enemies Be honest and sincere anyway
What you spend years creating , others could destroy overnight Create anyway
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous Be happy anyway
The good you do today will often be forgotten Do good anyway
Give the best you can, it may never seem enough Give your best anyway
In the final analysis, it is between you and your God, it was never about them anyway’
