It occurred to me this week as we look at reducing screen time for children, seeing the damage that constant stimulation has on their emotional & physical health that as adults we live in a world that rewards urgency. Constantly full of stimulation, of incoming information, our busy minds flip from one thing to the next all day. For many of us this busyness of the mind isn’t balanced by movement in the body and our nervous system feels it.
Productivity is often praised, so we feel the faster we move, the more valuable we are. We feel that everything ‘needs’ to be done rather than prioritising, perhaps delegating or simply realising that in fact some things are not as important as our busy minds tell us they are. And somewhere in the middle of all of that noise, many of us have forgotten something intrinsic to our well-being:
‘Rest is not a luxury ~ It is a biological necessity.
Think of yourself as a kettle, each stimulation, all the information, each thought and action, all of your daily tasks empty out your kettle. Our nervous systems were never designed for the level of stimulation we experience now. Notifications (really who needs that many?); scrolling (don’t get me started), multiple and often competing deadlines; multitasking and the persistent social message that we must maximize every moment, always be passionate and inspired, the list goes on ….
Like it or not we end up storing this pressure in our bodies, and it accumulates more than it releases over time because we are never “finished”, we must always be reaching, striving for that next task/goal outcome.
And yet with all this going on in our lives and bodies, we often say we are “Good, thanks. How are you?” when asked. We might appear fine in our daily lives, but our background systems are often running on overdrive.
In reality a nervous system that stays activated for too long, means we lose clarity and the ability to think creatively. We lose patience and become ‘reactive’ rather than being able to respond appropriately, But we keep pushing through surviving rather than living and we are in fact – exhausted.
Exhaustion becomes a way of life so much that we often don’t even notice until burnout arrives and we have no choice but to slow down.
‘Rest does not mean sleep. It is the intentional practice of safety.’
It is allowing your body to relax, to soften. Allowing the mind to let go. It is a moment where nothing is being asked of you. The savasana at the end of a yoga class where you have nowhere to be and nothing to do. Its simply you, your breath and your practice. Just for a while nothing else matters…
I get it, its hard work. You can see it in those first savasana we try – fidgeting, muscle spasms, busy minds resistant to stillness – to change. We begin to see that the mind likes the status quo but it doesn’t really care if that status quo is actually good for us. But if you can try to stay and enjoy it, honestly its worth it – ask any of my students who never thought yoga would be for them but now love the time spent in ‘rest’ as their practice comes to an end.
Truth is ‘rest’ can take many forms. Back your empty kettle here -“Rest” can be anything that fills your kettle back up. A friend of mine walks – across the downs – but she does it on her own without her phone constantly taking her attention away from the peace she finds, My own morning begins with a coffee in silence (full disclosure here not complete silence – usually birdsong and a snoring dog!) with my diary. It might be in our tiny garden or it might be by the fire but it’s the space and the peace that changes how I react to what the days brings. You might take an extra day off to make a long weekend. Say no, instead of yes (it’s a gamechanger), close the bathroom door and relax in a bath or even just take an extra-long pause before you answer.
It’s rest – a time to reset.
Practically when your nervous system feels safe, healing on all levels becomes possible. Only when we feel safe can we switch on that all important para sympathetic nervous system. Moving from the fight or flight response into this heal and restore response, we think more clearly and our bodies soften.
We unclench all the tension we carry and breathe. We listen more deeply. We reconnect with ourselves and the people around us and we realise what is important and what we can simply put down.
This is one of the reasons Yoga is my daily go to. It reminds us that we can let go, we can slow down, we can find the space and the peace to be ourselves and to nurture ourselves.
In yoga (from strong vinyasa to yin) rest is not separate from the practice. It is the Practice.
The pauses, (even in a full flow) between postures matter just as much as the movement itself. The breath between transitions. The moment of stillness inside the shape. These spaces allow the body to integrate what it has experienced rather than simply rushing or pushing into the next posture or needing to create the perfect shape.
Our nervous system responds deeply to these intentional moments of pause. Resting between postures allows the heart rate to settle, the breath to deepen, and the body to shift from doing into being. In these quiet moments, we begin to build awareness instead of urgency.
And then there is Savasana often our final yoga pose but perhaps the most important posture of all. It’s not a reward for finishing though in a strong vinyasa class it might initially feel like it. It’s a biological requirement allowing the nervous system to fully absorb the benefits of our practice. Because it is passive, it is also incredibly challenging for many of us to learn. To let go of the focus, to let go of the busyness. To REST.
Taking care of our bodies is not an optional extra, not less important than other tasks that need doing during our day. Our body is the only place we actually live. Taking the time to care of our body and mind is not a luxury – its wisdom.
So in a world full of incoming, where we are expected to always do ‘more’, consider putting down some of those expectations. Try ‘unlearning’ the fallacy that the more you do, the more you ‘fit in’, somehow the more fulfilled you or others will be. Redefine ‘rest’ not something that has to be earned or that goes to the bottom of a list that gets longer each day, not as sleep (sleep is sleep) but as a way to stay healthy, find perspective, live rather than simply survive. A way to find balance and fully connect to your life.
Think of yourself as a kettle, each stimulation, all the information, each thought and action, all of your daily tasks empty out your kettle. Rest fills your kettle back up. It is the intentional practice of safety. It is a time to reset. It is a biological necessity and it is available to us all making us feel happier and healthier for it.
